


4 times a pregnancy reveal didn't work, and one time it did.

by starberrylemonade



Category: Naruto
Genre: 4+1, F/M, Little bonuses at the end of every number as a writing style Choice, Multi, Pregnancy, Sasuke being so so stupid, Trans Pregnancy, brief angst, kurama as a concept, mentioned asumas death, mentioned kurenai, mentioned mirai, no sasuke dad rights. None, pregnancy reveals, trans naruhina
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-03
Updated: 2019-08-03
Packaged: 2020-07-30 03:29:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20090530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starberrylemonade/pseuds/starberrylemonade
Summary: She turns the corner to see the oven hanging open, completely turned off, a singular bread bun sitting inside. Minato’s hands are hanging like a tyrannosaurus at his chest. His mouth is hanging slightly open, eyes unblinking.“Kushina,” he begins, very quietly.“Yes?” She giggles around the word. Minato finally blinks once.“Why isn’t the oven on?”Oh no.---4 times naruto characters tried to reveal their pregnancies in a failed manner and one time it worked.





	4 times a pregnancy reveal didn't work, and one time it did.

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: i have not read or watched naruto, i only know so much and i hope what i have is right. Feel free to correct me if not.

  1. Kushina and Minato

Kushina is in his face the moment Minato opens the door. 

“Uh,” Minato croaks out. Kushina giggles. 

“Minato I left something in the oven, can you go get it for me?” Her face curls into a devious grin at her husband’s ‘yeah sure!’ From the doorway. She turns the corner to see said oven hanging open, completely turned off, a singular bread bun sitting inside. Minato’s hands are hanging like a tyrannosaurus at his chest. His mouth is hanging slightly open, eyes unblinking. 

“Kushina,” he begins, very quietly. 

“Yes?” She giggles around the word. Minato finally blinks once. 

“Why isn’t the oven on?” 

Oh  _ no. _

“Minato.”

“Yes.”

“What is inside the oven?”

“Bread?”

Kushina grits her teeth and reminds herself to be patient with her so-called genius hokage husband who has been working overtime. 

“Yes, honey, but what is it  _ specifically _ ?”

“Oh! A bun!”

Kushina gives herself a mental high-five.

“Yes! And it is…”

“In the oven.”

“Yes and?”

“...”

“Minato.”

“I don’t understand?”

“ _ Minato. _ ”

“I don’t get it, Kushina! It's just one bun? Not even two or three? The oven isn’t even on, I don’t think it was ever  _ warm _ , do I have to go get it fixed? It’s just sitting there now, just a random bun in the oven--”

Minato’s eyes go wide. His hands go back up to a dinosaur position as his eyes focus in on Kushina’s face. Kushina begins giggling again. 

“ _ Kushina _ .”

“Yes, Minato?” 

“Are you…?” 

Kushina nods once and Minato collapses on the floor. He sobs loudly into his hands, wiping away tears as fast as they come, choking out random noises. Kushina lets out another laugh, though she’s begun crying as well. She approaches him on the floor and Minato covers his face. 

“I’m pregnant,” she whispers and Minato lets out a loud whine that trails off with more sobs. 

“You’re gonna be a dad!” 

Minato finally lifts his face up and although it’s contorted with the power of the sobs wracking through him, his eyes are brighter than the sky, and his smile is so, so big. 

Bonus:

“Please,  _ please _ stop!” 

Kushina ignores her husband and continues telling their friends (and his team, which is three times as embarrassing because Obito and Rin want to know _ everything _ ) how Minato, genius hokage, was turned into a one brain cell crybaby by a singular piece of bread. Minato risks a peek through his hands and regrets it immediately at the sight of Kakashi’s neutral look of disappointment.

  1. Naruto and Hinata

Naruto yanks Sakura aside by the arm into Ichiraku’s to a booth all the way in the back. 

“Jeez, hello to you too.” Sakura flicks him in the forehead. “So what was it you ‘desperately needed to talk to someone about right now, actually’?” 

Naruto fidgets with the edge of his jacket, eyes darting from side to side.

“Well uh...you’re the only person I can really talk to about this, so you have to keep it quiet, okay?” 

Sakura’s face turns serious then, shoulders squaring. She nods once. Naruto takes a deep breath.

“I’m pregnant. A-and I want to tell Hinata but I’m not sure how I want to do--”

“You’re  _ pregnant _ ?”

Naruto and Sakura turn to Sasuke, who has appeared out of a random pocket of space to expel Naruto’s secret to the entire ramen shop. Or just miss Ayame, who gasps, smiles sheepishly at Naruto’s panicked expression, and gives him a thumbs up before disappearing into the back. Sakura rounds on Sasuke.

“ _ Really _ , Sasuke please have some tact. It was supposed to be a secret!”

“But you can’t get pregnant, Naruto.”

Sakura makes an expression somewhere between a grimace and accepted disappointment. Naruto snaps out of his mini dissociation chat with Kurama. 

“Sasuke. What are you talking about.” 

Sasuke scoffs like he’s the real true genius of team 7. 

“You’re a guy. You can’t  _ get _ pregnant. Stop making jokes.” 

Sakura’s head hits the table. Naruto has a little more patience. 

“Yes, I’m a guy but...Sasuke did you not know I was trans? You’ve seen me naked? When we were kids?” 

“Yeah but you had a really small dick then, too?”

Naruto’s face goes bright red and Sakura slaps a hand over her mouth to keep from laughing. It doesn’t work. 

“S-sasuke that was uh...I-i think you saw a um.” Naruto’s voice drops to quieter than it’s ever been as he whispers in Sasuke’s ear. 

Sasuke blinks. Its quiet for about ten seconds before his face also turns into a tomato and he sinks down all to quiet in the booth seat next to Sakura, avoiding Naruto’s eyes.

After Sakura finally catches her breath from laughing and they order their ramen (‘it's on the house’ Ayame says with a wink.) they begin brainstorming ideas on how to break the news to Hinata (‘Hinata got you pregnant?’ ‘ _ Who else would have, Sasuke?! _ ’ ‘Yeah  _ c'mon _ Sasuke! Believe it!’). 

“You could always do a bun in the oven reveal,” Sakura suggests. Naruto scrunches his nose.

“Kakashi-sensei told me that didn’t work well for my parents. Plus, I want to do something original, you know!” 

Sasuke stirs his ramen with his chopsticks and lets out a hum. Sakura taps on the table. They’re all stumped. So far they’ve thrown out writing it in ramen (Naruto), giving her the pregnancy test straight out (Sasuke), buying baby shoes (Sakura), and setting the table for three with kid’s dishes (Ayame). 

The three of them (four counting Ayame) throw around ideas until Teuchi has to reluctantly kick them out because he’s closing. Naruto heads home and immediately begins tearing the house apart looking for better ideas. He’s halfway through a semi-melted candy bar when Hinata opens the door with a quiet “I’m home.” 

Which is followed immediately by:

“Naruto-kun, what are you doing?” 

Naruto lets out a very panicked wheeze. 

“Ah, Hinata I’ve been freaking out for  _ hours _ ! I even tried to ask Sakura and Sasuke and that didn’t work so I had to come home and figure something out for myself and now the house is a mess I’m sorry I was just trying to figure out a creative way to tell you I’m pregnant--” 

Naruto slaps both his hands over his mouth and stares at Hinata with wide, fearful eyes. Hinata blinks. 

“I know.”

“...what?” 

“Naruto, I have the byakugan. I can see inside of you. I know you’re pregnant. I was waiting until you told me.”

Naruto’s hands drop to his side and his mouth hangs open. Hinata giggles. She throws her arms around her husband and holds on as tight as she can. Naruto nuzzles his nose into her neck and a laugh bubbles up from inside him. He lifts her up and spins her around the apartment, excited noises leaving him at every step as Hinata delves into a mass of unintelligible giggling and crying in his arms.

“I’m gonna be a dad!”

“You are!” She cries back.

“You’re gonna be a  _ mom _ !”

“I am!” 

They collapse onto the bed, both crying, both laughing, groceries and messy room abandoned for the feeling of being in each other’s arms. For a moment, all seems right with the world.

Naruto bolts upright.

“Wait does this mean I can’t eat ramen for 9 months?!” 

Bonus:

The toilet flushes and Hinata winces at the sound of Naruto’s groaning. He stumbles into the room clutching his stomach, kyuubi chakra flaring. 

“Good morning, honey,” Hinata squeaks out. Naruto points at her and tries to give an intimidating glare. Hinata represses a giggle.

“ _ You _ did this to me,” he groans. The discarded ramen box is sitting sadly in the trash can. 

  1. Sasuke and Sakura

Sakura wonders where she went wrong as she empties her breakfast in the grass. It’s been a few months since she and Karin began following Sasuke around on his journey. During those few months her friendship with the Uzumaki woman had strengthened, which had seemed odd considering their shared love for the dark haired man. 

A few weeks ago, however, Karin had been out gathering food for their little campsite, leaving Sakura and Sasuke alone. Sakura took her chance to finally get some attention and affection from the man, hoping for something a little more than a forehead tap. 

The stars must have really been in her favor that day because an hour later the two of them were sweating in an afterglow of sex. Sakura turned to Sasuke to say something,  _ anything,  _ but he was already dressing and had left before she could. 

Sakura’s stomach turns. She throws up again. Karin approaches her from behind.

“Is our great medic sick? Wow, the irony!” 

Sakura turns to Karin and attempts to muster a smile. It doesn’t work. She throws up. 

“Oh, ew.”

“Sorry you had to see that.” 

“You must really be sick, then. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you like this before. What did you do?”

‘ _ Slept with Sasuke while you were a mile away and forgot everything I learned in medical school about safe sex _ ,’ she thinks. Karin gives her a patient smile. Sakura gives herself a resounding ‘ _ fuck it _ ’. 

“I’m pregnant.”

“ _ Holy shit. _ ”

“I’m sorry.”

“Why are you apologizing? I know it’s Sasuke’s. I don’t really care.” 

She hands Sakura the towel that she dropped with a stiff smile.

“If anyone is going to carry on the Uchiha bloodline, might as well be someone who’s going to give her kid a punch to kill a god. I know that if it were me who was pregnant instead, you’d be by my side helping me. So I’m going to help you.”

“You aren’t mad?”

“I’m a little mad. I wanted him too, you know. And at least I know Naruto’s carrying on the Uzumaki blood. I’m also a little scared since you’re really the only one who knows how to deliver a baby on this team.”

Sakura lets herself smile. She sticks her hand out to Karin.

“Thank you.”

Karin shakes her hand and then immediately pulls her into a hug. Sakura blames the hormones for the tears that fall from her eyes as she grips Karin’s shirt. 

“So, how are you going to tell Sasuke?” 

Sakura drops her head onto Karin’s shoulder with a groan. Karin pats her back sympathetically. 

“We can do it together, if that helps. And for the record...if he doesn’t pull through, the kid can always have a cool aunt Karin.” 

Sakura smiles.

“Well, he didn’t even pull out, I don’t expect him to pull through.”

Sakura decides the laugh Karin lets out is worth the next 9 months of trouble she’s going to experience.

Bonus:

Sarada grows up with a mom and an aunt in the house and lots of loving father stand-ins. Sakura isn’t sure she should admit that she’s unbelievably proud when Sasuke goes flying across Konoha after Sarada meets him, tells him to fuck off, and socks him in the jaw. 

  1. Shikamaru and Temari

“I’m not ready.” Is Shikamaru’s immediate response. Temari’s caught between a very big ‘what the fuck’ and an even bigger slap to the face. 

“Yeah, well you’re not the one with a baby inside of her. Grow up, you’re going to be a dad.” 

“I…”

Temari catches him before he hits the ground, but his breaths come in staggered gasps. She’s thankful to Ino for teaching her how to help Shikamaru through his panic attacks as she grasps his hand and tells him to follow her breathing.

She keeps a tight grip on his hand as Shikamaru leans his head back into the wall. His eyes are closed and Temari lets him think. 

“My father was a kind man,” he whispers. “Sure, he was a little tough on me, but I had a clan name riding on my shoulders. When I stepped up to become the head I wasn’t ready. I thought I would be, but he was taken from me so quickly. For the first time in my life, I didn’t have a backup plan.”

Temari rubs circles with her thumb on his hand when it starts shaking. 

“When Asuma died, my father was there for me. He let me break. He was there to pick up the pieces after I fell apart. And when I look at Mirai I think about how Asuma would have done the same for her.

“Now all of our friends are going to be parents and I see how they all worry about what’s coming and I think about him. He never knew he was going to be a father. I see how Kurenai looks at me when I’m with Mirai. I know she wants Asuma instead and I know I’m just a shitty replacement for him. I can’t...”

Shikamaru trails off and presses the heel of his palm into his eyes. Temari taps his hand twice to get his attention.

“You know I’m not good with words, Shika.” She waits for Shikamaru to look at her before continuing. “I wouldn’t have let you get me pregnant if I didn’t think we were ready. And you know, you talk about your father in such high regard but my father...wasn’t a great man. So when I see you, the way you interact with Mirai and other pre-genin students, it’s like...I don’t know, it just feels right. No one’s ever going to be perfect at it, but I know that I want to give my child the opportunity to have the loving father I didn’t get to have. I trust you, Shikamaru. You’re going to be just fine.” 

Temari pats his cheek.

“Plus, you have me. We’re in it together, you know. That’s kinda how this whole marriage thing works.” 

Shikamaru smiles at her and Temari fights down the urge to scream at how soft she’s become when she falls into his arms to kiss him. 

“Parents, huh? Sounds troublesome…” 

There’s absolutely no bite behind it, but Temari punches him in the arm anyway. 

Bonus:

“You know Ino, when you said we had three weeks max to get our wives pregnant, I really wasn’t expecting to go through with that.”

Ino drops the meat between her chopsticks with a delighted gasp. 

“Congratulations!” She yells. Shikamaru offers her a shy smile before turning to Choji. 

“So, when are you gonna get on that, huh?” 

Choji smiles.

“Karui’s been pregnant longer than Ino, actually.” 

The table erupts into chaos.

+1. Ino and Sai

Ino blinks at the pregnancy test in her hands. She sets it down. Rubs her eyes. Looks at it again. 

“Yep, still there...it’s real, huh?” 

She leans back in her chair, smiling at nothing. She can’t wait to tell Sai. 

Ino meets Sai outside and drags him inside by the collar the moment he rounds the street corner. He sits down on the couch, blinking owlishly up at Ino. 

“Um...I’m sorry?” 

Ino sputters.

“For  _ what _ , honey?”

“I was told that if your wife grabs you so suddenly, then you might be in trouble. Sasuke told me that.” 

“Well, Sasuke’s an idiot, you don’t always have to listen to him. He’s technically a war criminal.” 

Sai takes in this information by nodding sagely. Ino walks into the bedroom and appears again with a hand behind her back. She sits down on the sofa and hands him the test with a grin. 

“Tada!” She announces with a flourish of her hands. Sai looks at the small test in his hands. At the faintly marked plus sign. Back at Ino. Back to the test. His hands curl around it gently as if he were handling glass. 

“I’m pregnant,” she adds with a patient smile. “You’re going to be a father.” 

Sai’s eyes go wide. He doesn’t say anything, but his hands begin shaking.

“Sai? You okay?” 

Ino sets a hand on his shoulder. Sai’s head snaps upright. Tears are flowing down his cheeks. Ino lets out a quiet gasp and her hands hover around him, unsure where to land. She settles them on her lap and waits for Sai to work through his emotions. She understands that they are still confusing and scary for him, and that sometimes he needs a moment to process. Her fingers fiddle with the wedding ring on her hand and watches her husband with analytical eyes. 

He closes his eyes and leans forward until his forehead is touching his lap, fingers tracing the outline of the small stick. When he breathes out, there’s a tremor in his throat.

“We…”

Another breath. 

“We’re going to be a family?” 

Sai’s eyes finally meet Ino’s and there’s a kind of pleading behind them that she hasn’t seen since their wedding day. His dark eyes, red rimmed and crying, search hers for any moment of hesitation or apprehension. The nonverbal moments of their relationship always felt like a quiet interrogation. Sai’s training with root made him an expert at picking up the tiniest signs of weakness in a person’s body, and Ino’s years of using the Yamanaka technique let her monitor body language carefully. 

“Yes,” Ino replies with all the confidence she can give. There isn’t a bit of uncertainty in her voice, and fresh tears begin to fall from Sai’s eyes. He gives her a smile (a true, genuine smile, the one she fell in love with) and reaches a hand towards her. She returns the smile and gesture, pressing their palms together. 

“Thank you,” Sai whispers, and Ino understands it’s about more than the baby. 

Bonus:

Ino watches as Sai runs a paintbrush across the wall of their new nursery. A smile hasn’t left his face since he started at the crack of dawn. Ino carefully leans down to kiss her husband on the forehead. He returns the kiss to her swollen belly and she laughs at the contact. 

“I’m glad I managed to convince you to use color,” she teases. Sai smiles bashfully and tucks the paintbrush behind his ear. Ino wipes a smudge of blue off his cheek and gazes over the landscape of konoha Sai painted. His hand rests on her stomach to feel their baby kick and the joy in his eyes is something she wouldn’t trade for the world. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this a while ago. Like a WHILE ago. Its also unbeta'd.


End file.
